One of the most isolating feelings in the world is being the victim of an abusive relationship — but you are not alone.
In the USA, 24 people per minute are victims of assault, aggression, or stalking by an intimate partner. Verbal and psychological abuse is also unfortunately common.
If you’ve found yourself married to an abusive partner and feel like all hope is gone, it’s not. You can still leave and begin to live your life again, without those feelings of isolation and hopelessness.
It’s important to leave safely, particularly if your partner might be prone to violence or children are involved. Prioritize yourself and your children above all else.
1. Prepare to Leave
If your partner’s behavior is slowly escalating, it might be time to make a plan to leave.
When you’re away from them, call a spousal abuse hotline. They will be able to tailor advice to your situation and advise you what the best and safest thing to do is.
If you can do so safely and without detection, save some of your money in an account that your partner does not have access to. That way, when you leave, you will have emergency funds.
However, if your partner is violent, it’s time to get away immediately.
2. Do So Quietly
Whether your partner is physically violent or psychologically, it’s important to remember that you don’t owe them anything. It can be hard not to prioritize your spouse in a marriage, but an abusive marriage is one such situation where you should only be thinking about yourself.
Leave when they’re at work or out of the house, particularly if you fear that it might turn into a physical fight. You can hash out the details of your divorce in a neutral setting later, with a mediator.
Protecting the children is also essential so if your kids are involved and you’re tempted to talk it out with your partner before leaving, think of their safety. Would it be compromised by such a move?
3. File a Restraining Order (Or Another Court Order)
Asking the court to grant a restraining order or some other protective order for you and/or your children might be essential to your safety.
Abusive partners can be unpredictable and if there’s any doubt in your mind that you’ll be left alone after the separation, you should talk to the court. Don’t wait until your divorce — you can be granted an order that might help right after you leave.
4. Remember Why You Left
One of the hardest things about leaving an abusive partner is resisting the temptation to go back. When all of those signs of a toxic relationship aren’t right in front of your face anymore, you might remember the good times instead.
Stay level-headed. If necessary, talk to a friend, ask them to keep you grounded. Returning will only cause you more pain.
Divorcing an Abusive Partner Is Not Easy, but You Can Do It Safely
Leaving an abusive partner is a daunting prospect. What if it’s the wrong decision, or what if it results in consequences?
Don’t worry — it can be done safely if you take all the right precautions, and no one should live in fear. Seek advice and leave when you know it’s safe to.
If you need a divorce lawyer in York, PA, contact us. You won’t be disappointed.